System Status
🔴 Major outage (something is wet)
🟢Andrew is
Available (ish)Available, God help me
Available (ish)Available, God help me
2Open tickets
1Active floods
4Resolved this week
5.0★Avg satisfaction
Last ticket resolved: 17h ago.
Service Level Agreement
| Requester | Response time |
|---|---|
| Mom | Immediately |
| Immediate family | Same day |
| Friends | Within 1–3 business days |
| Friends who brought beer last time | Within 1 business day |
| People who "just have a quick question"People who "just have a quick question" (it is never quick) | Eventually |
Uptime: 99.9% (excluding weekends, holidays, football, and naps).